I want to make changes

Relationships can be challenging and make us feel vulnerable.

Being intimate with someone means getting close enough to get hurt. This means our emotions feel stronger than they do with other people: we can get frustrated, feel jealous and worry when things aren’t working how we want them to. We sometimes find ourselves behaving in ways which hurt or scare the people around us, and make us feel bad about ourselves. But it’s never too late to start making changes.

Support for you

How we can help

Changes is a voluntary programme that assists people who are concerned they might be hurting, scaring or controlling their partner, and who want help to make things better. We help them to make positive changes in their life so they stop their abusive behaviour towards their partners or ex-partners.

This service is completely free of charge and tailored to meet individual needs.

We provide one-to-one assessments, individual and group-work sessions which help people to understand relationship difficulties, how to take responsibility for abusive behaviour, and how to make positive changes for themselves, their partners/ex-partners, and their children (if they have any).

We accept referrals from a variety of sources, including self-referrals. Our referring criteria is as follows:

I have learnt what abuse really is and understanding what other people think is abuse and not abuse. I am learning how to deal with my mistakes. I am a self-referral and attend voluntarily, I have not been forced to attend but find I did need it. It is helping me to become a better person. It is making my relationship better and I understand how my partner has been feeling. I think all men should have access to learn how to be a better person.”

Since I started this course I have realised how bad my behaviour was towards my ex-wife and kids and all the people around me. I have learned to have empathy, non-abusive ways to communicate and about equality. I have learned about positive thinking and have ‘time outs’ and how being abusive hurts other people. I have learned skills I hope I can pass onto my kids and become a good role model to them.”

I’ve never done anything like this before. What should I expect?

You’ll be initially invited to attend an assessment, complete a risk assessment and work through an initial evaluation. Once complete, you’ll be invited to attend a series of group sessions. The group is facilitated by professionals and delivers a structured programme which addresses different forms of abusive behaviour.

Sessions will include:

Power and control
Effects of DV on victims
Signals and timeout
Emotional abuse
Effects on children
Intimidation
Accountability
Sexual abuse
Violence and non-violence wheels